1. |
My Life In Hollywood
02:33
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this is less a question than a comment
war is over if you want it
and i'd trade all my past lives for a future
never bought that hippy mumbo jumbo
had myself some seasons in the sun though... and for what?
businessmen they drink my wine
and i drink theirs from time to time
it's fine feels good
my life in hollywood
every picture tells a story
now what is this that stands before me?
let's pretend that everybody here can hear what you're thinking
twenty years from now we'll say
i'd give anything to relive those days
but now
we're always wishing time away
summer's here and the hour is late
come on we could
my life in hollywood
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2. |
The Apology Rag
03:06
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almost caught you in the act
sneaking up behind your back
but you've always had a knack
for noticing when someone's closing in
now every since the incident
we've tried to practice active listening
and now we only hear the cracks in our old favorite tracks
so i'll call this one the apology rag
and i wrote it lying flat on my back
i only tell tell you that i'm only human after i've done something bad
otherwise i let you assume i can be more than i am
i do what i can
a fragile kind of grace you only notice when it breaks
and the parts you can't replace
start to symbolize the good old simple life
our dancing days are through
we put on our other shoes
the jury turned in with the verdict
i guess that's why they call it paying your dues
and i wrote this one lying flat on my back
and i call it the apology rag
i only tell you that i'm only human after i've done something wrong
otherwise i hide behind an outline
say i was there all along
you got me all wrong
a life-affirming work of art
at once familiar and bizarre
every line seemed to remind us
of a time before we became who we are
but let me ask you this
do those so-called times exist?
we made a life but not a living
and in an instant
that's all that there is
raise your glasses to all the good times we had
raise your voices in the apology rag
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3. |
Auditioning For The Part
03:21
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i've been working all day trying to keep my instincts under control
so let me say i found a better way of rockin your soul
i wanna knock you off your feet although you're watching from your seat
will you stop me if i read for the role?
i'm auditioning for the part of the man who steals your heart
and i've got my lines down good
i got a face for hollywood
and no other leading man could be a truer bluer fan of your work
you're the one who got away
and it's the role i was born to play
you shrug and you sigh, 'i guess let's get this over with'
you highlight all of my lines and you toss me over the script
and you clap and then say action and i gasp and freeze and panic
and i swear this never happens
that's it
that's how i lost the part of the man who steals your heart
i choked and missed my shot
can't even say i gave it all i got
now some other leading man is gonna do it for the money and run
but it's the role i was born to play
and it's the one that got away
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4. |
New Harbor View
02:01
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in the new place for a while
we had to turn on a light
when we'd wake up in the middle of the night
to get a glass of water
feelin our way along the walls
from the bedroom down the hall
to the sink
and after some time
we didn't need a light
we could get there with our eyes closed or open
where once i wanted freedom
now i long for security
and where once we had potential
now we share a history
in the new place
for a while
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5. |
Better Investments
03:07
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how do you feel when you look at the deal you've been given
when the starlight hits your eyes as you leave your apartment
what feeling comes over you as you take in the view where you're living
and the parking lot's like a rorschach inkblot of heaven
i never felt you got what you paid for
trapped inside a broken glass elevator
you put all your faith in me
the bargain of the century
knowing that i wasn't your best bet
love is like the lottery
it's gotta go to somebody
and every day they just keep you guessing
the stakes are high to roll the dice
there was a time you felt alive
lately it's been mostly depressing
you put all your faith in me
now you've been making better investments
how do you feel as the dealer reveals what he's holding
are you helpless to the nagging impulse to try your numbers
and the music they play to try to get you to stay is infernal
the fluorescent glow and the cigarette smoke hold you under
it's only because they don't want you to leave
the time you spend is real, the rest is make believe
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6. |
Fragments
04:13
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the slow burn of time is dull and unforgiving
you miss watching paint dry when you notice that it's chipping
i imagine you looking for a spot in the snow
driving slow down narrow roads
and in this vision you are always driving alone
wants to dye his hair black but his mom and dad won't let him
somewhat heartened by the fact they seem to be really paying attention
from this perspective on the memory
you catch your reflection and like what you see
can almost make out the vague shape of a family
between this moment and the sunrise you won't say another word
the highway from your mind to the world beyond your eyes
is closed for the night
and you will take comfort in your own company
come tomorrow who can say what will become of any of these dreams
only hope that you'll know that
i'm listening
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7. |
Live And Dangerous
02:52
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i'm listening to live and dangerous in a backyard in spring
and the sky's a kind of turquoise spinning gold from everything
and i turn on a ceiling fan in my head
and a low ambient hum shakes off all the sweat
turn me into something you can use
let me know when i've outstayed my welcome
and i know you gotta go but i don't want you to leave
i'm envisioning this moment from a distance recurring like a dream
and it was raining so hard you could hear it in the airport
in the tender parts of our brain haunted by what we're unprepared for
won't you show me what this thing can do
let me know when i've outlived my use
and it's late
and i'm drunk
and i love you
hope was the thing with wings that flew above us
money was the thing we didn't have enough of
hopes were too high and the money went dry
and what's born in flames
sometimes dies that way too
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8. |
Still Life
03:01
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a painting of a table set for dinner in the summer
the window lets a sentimental light in through the shutters
it is evening though it looks like it is morning
the humidity is visible and rippling
mama told me there'd be days like these
plays softly on a stereo somewhere in the neighborhood
the child in your mind turns and dances
the sunshine bores a hole into the canvas
fireworks and lightning entertaining in the sky
you're watching as the rain falls on the swimming pool at night
you're crying in a bathtub in a basement
overflowing all your sacred hiding places
navigating awful pathways in the dark
open up your heart to me, i wanna see the broken part
people bond faster when they're complaining
and thunder only happens when it's raining
we knew something big was coming but we couldn't say what
the night sky made the sound of heavy doors slamming shut
and i could have stayed there for a long time
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9. |
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teacher's pet in a private jet
tracking trends through a critical lens
minor setbacks turn unmanageable
you are courting disaster
chasing the spark
you started the fire
that started the whole world running
unintentional and unbecoming
you burn the place to the ground
years blur by
and you've yet to find your end game
the silent letter in your pen name
never spoken aloud
hired gun for the setting sun
it gets harder to say what's still in your way
when you clear the path out for whatever comes next
you are free as you'll ever be
and the only one left
headlights approach
to set the wild night to grayscale
find a never-ending stairwell
follow it down
sleep through the night
in the comfort of a bed frame
undercover of your pen name
and the shadow of doubt
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